Five Favorites: How I Met Your Mother Edition

So, my beloved How I Met Your Mother ends... tonight. TONIGHT! Can you believe it? If you didn't read my blog last year, you missed how emotional I was about The Office ending. Well... this is no different. I'm really upset about it. What am I going to do now that it's over? What am I going to watch? How long will this episode live on my DVR? (Probably forever. Sorry, G$.)

Anyway, in honor of the finale tonight, I'm coming at you with all my favorites.

Five Favorite Episodes
The Bachelor Party 
"You just winked!" "No, I didn't!" *wink*
This is the first episode that we really get a glimpse of Barney Stinson, Nice Guy. You know Barney's spent his entire adult life Barney makes a real mess of Marshall's bachelor party, and Marshall threatens to dis-invite him from the wedding. Lily comes to Barney's defense, explaining to the group that Barney flew to San Francisco to convince Lily to come back to New York so she and Marshall can get back together.
How Your Mother Met Me.
"I like to believe in people. Besides, what are the chances we're both serial killers?"
I loved this episode.
Drumroll, Please
"A drum roll?! That's it? So what you just said good night, came home and performed a drum solo?"
Ted and Victoria meeting. Their almost kiss. Robin crying in the bathroom. Their actual kiss at the end. Perfection.
Something Borrowed
"It's for the bride!"
This is actually the first HIMYM episode I saw - it was a free download on iTunes or something, so I watched it one morning while I was waiting for one of my classes to start. I was instantly hooked. All the characters were so relatable and wonderful, and I knew immediately that this was a show I was going to love. Luckily, my friend Kelsey already had the first season on DVD, so I was able to catch up quickly.
Natural History
"Yeah, old stuff's great!"
In this episode, the characters see their past selves in museum exhibits. They realize that they're not the people they used to be - and that's okay. Great, even. We all need that lesson at some point in our lives.

Five Favorite Characters
Victoria. Still love her. I think she's adorable and charming and really good for Ted. If the mother wasn't actually The Mother, I would totally want Victoria to be the mother (which is cool, because apparently, if the show had ended after season 8, she would have been. That's why they brought her back).
Mickey Aldrin. I know he and Lily have had their issues, but I love the relationship that they have now. (And Chris Elliot is hilarious.)
The Blitz. Awwww, mannnnn. The Blitz addressed something we're all familiar with: FOMO, or Fear Of Missing Out. Also, I've loved Jorge Garcia since, well, forever.
Ranjit. Hellooooooooooo, he is the best. The end.
Patrice. I know, I know, no one asked me (LOL GET IT?), but there's just something about Patrice that is just HILARIOUS to me.

Five Favorite Jokes
The Slap Bet. I'm probably way more entertained by the slap bets than I should be, and I'm so glad that Marshall got in his last slap before the show ended.
Interventions. There are times where we want to do interventions on our friends, right?
Challenge Accepted. We should all go through life with Barney's outlook on challenges.
Lawyered. This one has made it into my vocabulary.
High Fives - specifically, Lily and Marshall's. I wish I was that in sync with anyone. Right?

Five Favorite Rules
You know how Barney always says "I only have ONE rule..." and then he says a different rule each time? These are my favorite rules:
Ask yourself, “What would Ted do?” Then do the opposite. This is pretty self explanatory, right?
Never order a “small” beer. I mean, it's boring. And probably not economical.
Black tie is never optional. You'll never regret dressing fancy, ever.
Never pass up a free sample. That's just common sense.
New is always better. Okay, this might not *always* be true. Sometimes, old is better. But SOMETIMES, new is definitely better. Okay, most of the time.

Five Favorite Predictions
Victoria is still actually The Mother. I know it's not going to happen. But WHAT IF she does the wedding cake, and Ted sees her there, and then they run off together? Don't rule it out, that's all I'm saying.
We find out that The Mother isn't dead like everyone is speculating. I'm not sure if you've heard all these 'The Mother Is Dead' theories, but I think they're ridiculous. I think that'd be way too dark for a show that's been so lighthearted and hilarious.
Lily finally makes Marshall Pay Up. Remember their bet about Ted and Robin ending up together? Hopefully at some point tonight they address that bet and Marshall finally pays her. I REALLY hope it doesn't end up with Marshall saying "not yet" again because if there is one more reference to Robin and Ted getting together again I will SERIOUSLY LOSE MY MIND. That would be the worst end to the series ever.
Ted's first interaction with The Mother will be incredibly weird. This isn't as much of a prediction as it is just a fact. Ted is the worst, and it wouldn't be surprising if he made a huge mess of this whole thing.
Ted's retelling the story because they're all super famous now and they're making a movie about Ted's life - that's why Bob Saget is narrating the story, instead of Ted. Okay, this one's probably pretty outlandish. BUT IT'D BE PRETTY COOL, RIGHT?

ITS FALL TV TIME

So, I had a different post planned for today, but I wasn't really feeling the subject matter this morning, so we're going to table that post until later in the week.

I was actually in a pretty blah mood this morning. Not bad I guess, just... blah. But then I realized - FALL TV STARTS TODAY.

Mood lifted. Immediately.

And while I'm still not used to the fact that we officially live in a post-Office society, I'm pretty excited about what's coming up.

Of course, there are the forever favorites:

Thrilled about Parenthood coming back. It seems like it's ALWAYS on the chopping block, so I'm stoked it got renewed - and at a full season this year, instead of that shortened season crap it got last year.

And of course, HIMYM. I'm doing a totally separate post about that, though.

There are the new favorites:

I had watched both of these intermittently, but binge-watched them all this summer and am TOOOOTALLY obsessed, like most of you.

There are the guilty pleasure competition shows:

feel free to definitely judge me for any and all of these. YOLO or whatever.

There are the new shows I'm going to watch and try not to get too attached to because they'll probably be cancelled because television executives are sadists who enjoy watching me cry:

And of course, there's the show that should be back and definitely isn't and I'm still really freakin' bitter about it:

What are you most excited for this season? I'm less than thrilled with the selection of new shows, but hopefully some of them will turn out to be great!

Our favorite ladies are back!

Courtesy of BravoTV.com

It's that time again - the New Jersey Housewives are back, and I am PUMPED.

(lol GET IT? New Jersey? Fist pumps? Okay, anyway.)

So let's recap: the last time we saw the ladies at the reunion, things were no good. Teresa was still acting like a petulant two year old (yo girl, when your nine year old daughter is more mature than you, it's time to take a step back, ya dig?) and hurling insults at anyone she could. Jacqueline had revealed that her son had been recently diagnosed with autism and had lost his ability to speak, Kathy was looking to start her own catering company, and Caroline and Dina were no longer speaking.

As far as Teresa and Melissa's relationship goes, it looked like things had started to look up towards the end of season four, but at the season four reunion, we saw that that definitely wasn't the case.

This season will be interesting, because a lot of it is happening almost two years after the events we saw in season three and season four. The season three reunion show, that Jacqueline was so famously absent from, occurred the day after the Posche Fashion Show where Teresa set up the whole stripper situation with that dudebro Angelo.

The season is starting off with coverage of Hurricane Sandy, which I think is interesting because these women live lives that most of us only dream of, but they're prone to the elements just like we are. Is featuring Hurricane Sandy and their efforts to rebuild their lives a nod to the fact that this season will feature the ladies trying to rebuild their relationships? I think it might be.

I'll tell you guys: Teresa is far and away my least favorite housewife. She always has been. To me, it always felt like she was trying to force the appearance of wealth onto the viewers - always making a point to spend large amounts of cash on furniture and her daughters, and saying things like "we can afford to have another baby, so why not?" (We know now that their in vitro treatments were part of the debt that they owed, so you know, they couldn't REALLY afford another baby. But that's irrelevant.) However, from the things that we've been seeing and reading about season five, it looks like she's finally realizing that this belligerent, stubborn, immature attitude is pushing everyone away, and she's working to make amends. Hopefully she and Melissa can finally turn over a new leaf.

There will be more "friends of the housewives" too, but these ladies might cause more trouble than the Housewives themselves: Kim DePaola, Jennifer Dalton, and Penny Drossos. I'll tell you guys: I absolutely HATE Kim D. I don't think she adds anything but drama, and the ladies have enough of that as it is. I don't know much about Jennifer Dalton, other than the fact that she's Teresa's friend, so that could really go either way. The other "friend" is Penny Drossos. I don't know much about her, but she's married to John Karagiorgis, who has filed assault charges against Jacqueline, Chris and Joe Gorga after a fight at -you guessed it- the Posche Fashion Show. Allegedly, he's been harassing the women for several years, so seeing that dynamic play out this season will be interesting to say the least.

And don't worry, all of our favorite Real Kids of New Jersey will be back, too. Lauren is running her store Cafface, Ashley Ashlee and her new nose will be visiting from LA, and it looks like Milania Giudice of "Gimme pizza, you old troll" fame has learned some new dance moves. Because of course she has. Sadly, though, Greg won't be back, as he moved to San Francisco. I won't lie, this news made me question whether or not I even wanted to watch this season. I mean really. Greg is the best.

So I wanna know: Who's your favorite New Jersey housewife? What are you most excited for this season? Do you think the ladies (all of them) will redeem themselves? Do you think Teresa and Melissa  will finally bury the hatchet? Are you judging me yet for being this invested in reality television?

The Office.

"There's a lot of beauty in everyday things. Isn't that kind of the point?"

I thought that the Office finale was absolutely perfect. I literally couldn't have asked for more.
(This post has spoilers.)

I loved every single minute of that episode. I already mentioned how much I love Jim and Dwight together. I love love love how their relationship has developed. I loved watching Jim as his Best Man, and seeing Jim, Pam, Angela and Dwight sitting and laughing together at the end was the perfect way to tie everything up. Also, I'm pretty sure I want to walk down the aisle to Sweet Child of Mine now. Because that was amaze.

The way they handled Michael's return was absolutely flawless. I'm absolutely shocked it stayed a secret until now, and I'm so glad it did. We got to see that life has given him everything he wanted, and he got to do one last That's What She Said. It was poignant and wonderful, but it didn't overshadow the wedding or the finale. So well done. Perfect.

People have made fun of me and joked that it isn't real. And I mean, yeah, of course it's not real. But the emotions, the relationships, the laughs... those are all real. It's always been optimistic and honest and relatable and wonderful. No matter how much things change, the way we experience emotion doesn't. Ever. That will always be the same. I'm glad I've had The Office in my life for nine years, and I'm glad that we'll still have it for many years to come.

A Farewell To The Office

My favorite (and least favorite) episodes, a few predictions, and a thank you.

It's no secret that I'm a huge Office fan. If this is news to you, then this must be the first time you're reading my blog. Hi! I'm glad you're here! I promise I'm not as crazy as this post makes me sound. That's a lie. Sorry, that was our first lie. I promise that even though I'm crazy, I'm super fun and I'll try to always make you laugh.

I want to take some time to talk about a few of my favorite episodes, my favorite cold opens, my least favorites (ugh), and a few other things. Let's get started, shall we?

I don't have one favorite episode, but I do have several that I love. Spoiler alert: most of them involve Jim and/or Pam and/or Dwight. #sorrynotsorry

Niagara, parts 1 & 2 (season 6): Jim and Pam's romance was one of the first TV romances that I really felt invested in. I'm not one of those people that sits around and wishes for their own Jim, because helloooo, he's a fictional character. But I would be lying if I said I didn't cry at the end of the episode when he said "plan A was marrying her a long time ago." And I'd be SUPER lying if I said I didn't still cry every time I watched it. Definitely one of the best TV weddings I've ever seen. 

Conflict Resolution (season 2): This episodes starts with Oscar and Angela fighting over one of those creepy baby posters. Michael (in true Michael style) goes to his handy Office Conflict binder and smartly decides that they should shoot for a win-win-win outcome, instead of a lose-lose or win-lose scenario. I love this one because eventually Michael reads through all of Dwight's complaints against Jim, and since Jim/Dwight pranks are one of the main reasons I love this show, seeing a bunch in one episode was kiiiiiiind of amazing.

Fun Run (Season 4): I love this episode because we get to really see how clueless, narcissistic and endearing Michael Scott really is. He runs Meredith over with his car in the beginning, and while she's in the hospital, they discover that she has rabies. This inspires Michael to put together the Michael Scott Dunder Mifflin Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race for the Cure. Because of course it did. At the end of the episode, Michael says into the camera, "Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me... No, don't sue me. That is the opposite of the point that I'm trying to make." which I've always loved and thought was one of my favorite Office quotes. This is also one of the first times we see Jim and Pam hold hands!!!

A.A.R.M (Season 9): Okay, this was only from last week. But I thought it was SO GOOD. It had a lot going on: Jim and Dwight's relationship has evolved into a pretty adorable one, first of all. Watching Oscar and Angela try to co-parent was hilarious. "Saddle shoes with jeans? I will call CPS myself." Darryl's final dance with everyone was adorable. Being able to see the DVD that Jim had the crew put together for Pam was great, and I was THRILLED to see Jim finally give the letter to Pam he's had since season TWO. (I cried.) But as much as I love Jim and Pam, my favorite part of the episode was at the very end when Dwight pulls Angela over and tells (yells at) her that he really does love her. I'm so excited for the wedding tonight, and that Dwight and Angela get their happy ending. In some ways, it feels like more of a payoff than Jim and Pam's did. I mean, there was so much suspense before they got together, but we all knew they'd get together eventually. With Dwight and Angela, it's been nine seasons of will they? won't they? we love them! we hate them! we love them again! I'm so excited they're going to end up together.

I only have three least favorite episodes, but I really, really hate those episodes. Ugh. What were they thinking? I have no idea. I don't even know how I made it through Scott's Tots. So awkward. I was physically uncomfortable the whole time. Same with The Dinner Party at Jan and Michael's. I still cringe when I think about Hunter's awful, awful song. And Business School... I can't pinpoint exactly why I hate that episode, but I find myself quickly changing the channel every time I see it on TV. Ugh.

A few predictions, or what I would like to see tonight on the Finale:
I hope we get to see Michael Scott. I'm not sure if he'll be an attendant at the wedding, because I'm not sure Steve Carell wants that for Michael's story. He said upon his departure that he was incredibly pleased with how they wrapped up his story, so I'm not sure if a return to Scranton is in the cards. However, I would like to see at least a quick shot of his life with Holly. I'm hoping they have a kid or two (maybe adoption?) because ultimately, that's what Michael always wanted. And I hope they show him viewing the documentary, because his last words to the camera when he left were "call me if this ever airs." I hope they do a little something with that.
I hope they wrap up Jim and Pam with the Athlead situation fully resolved. I kiiiinda wish they would go for it, and move to Philadelphia. I could see them living there, and I think Pam ultimately would like it.
Since the episode is set a few months into the future, I hope that Dwight and Angela have another baby (or that she's pregnant with a second). I want them to be able to experience the baby process together.
I kinda hope Andy gets some kind of theater break, but then again I kinda hope he doesn't. I love Ed Helms, but I kinda have a hate-boner for Andy Bernard. I'm just sick of him a little. But seeing him achieve some fame would be nice. I guess.

Dear The Office:
Thank you. Thank you for nine years of hilarious Thursday nights. Thank you for providing the world with That's What She Said jokes. Thank you for introducing us to some of the best characters television has see in my lifetime. Thanks for giving us all the jokes and laughs and quotable quotes. (PSA: I'll be quoting The Office for a long, long time.) Thanks for being that show that I have to explain to people because they just didn't "get it." Thanks for being consistent in my life for nine years. Nine years. What else has been this consistent? Not that many things. But The Office has always been there. I'm really going to miss you, you ridiculous TV show. Thanks for everything. We'll miss you.
much love, alyssa


I know I usually try to keep language off my blog, but this is the only gif I can find that appropriately demonstrates how I feel:

Trashiest TV in the Land

It's no secret that I love some truly, truly awful TV shows. Just awful. And I'm not even a little bit sorry about it.

So obviously, I tuned into the premiere of What Would Ryan Lochte Do? on E!

(via)

Look at this beautiful, beautiful idiot. Just look at him. So beautiful. And so, so dumb.

I wish I had been taking a shot every time this boy clearly just got lost in his own brain. I mean, it is truly intriguing. (I'm going to create a drinking game. I AM! It's going to be next week's post.)

He's a SHOE DESIGNER! Did you guys know this? I didn't. But I'm so glad that I do now. I did some research to see if you could buy his shoes online but couldn't find anything. Trust me though, if I find an online store somewhere, you guys will be the first to know!

I don't know what I was expecting, but I was surprised to see how much air time his family got. The relationship that he has with his brother (who he also lives with) is absolutely precious. Maybe it's because I love my own brother so much, so I love watching other people interacting with theirs, but man, it is just too adorable.

He's kind of a dummy, but I'd be lying if it wasn't a little endearing. I mean, I surely wouldn't want to marry him. But to be a 28 year old guy who was thrown into an international spotlight recently, he and his family seem, on the whole, pretty freakin' normal.

Did you guys watch? What did you think? Would you let Ryan Lochte take you on a date to a sushi place? I probably would. I mean, if I wasn't already getting married, of course. I just... really like sushi.

Now, changing gears a little bit - I've mentioned briefly on here that I love Teen Mom. I love it. I can't get enough. I tuned in to Farrah's Dr Phil episode and watched every second on the edge of my seat. This home movie (ahem) situation that she has going on right now with James Deen is beyond entertaining to me. She did something shady, and she got caught. But instead of owning up to it, she's lying and complaining and being totally awful about it. That girl is eight different levels of delusional, and I think it is hysterical.

PSA: Did you miss Farrah on Dr Phil on Friday? You can watch it here! The quality isn't great, but it's better than nothing and I promise you won't regret it.

But something happened this week on Teen Mom 2, and I'd be lying if I said it hasn't been bothering me this week.

MTV has been criticized before for filming things instead of interfering. They took a lot of heat for filming Amber Portwood hit her boyfriend in the head, and then airing it to teenagers. My issue isn't necessarily with the abuse - obviously it's horrid, but I would never recommend someone get in the middle of a domestic dispute. You could just make it worse. What bothers me more is that not one person on the film crew tried to remove Leah from the situation. They didn't have to take her out of the house, just pick her up and move her to a different room so she didn't watch her mother hit her father.

(via)

Anyway, that's kind of a tangent. Monday, we saw Keiffer try to score some dope for Jenelle. Apparently, her depression was starting to get the better of her, so Keiffer offered to go get her some dope with the last $70 that they had. He actually said the word "dope." On TV. And MTV decided to air it.

Now, I love reality tv shows. But there's a line. And I feel like it keeps getting crossed. Why doesn't MTV just stop filming her? It's doing her way more harm than good, and I'm sure I'm not the only viewer who's just kind of uncomfortable watching her now. Stop filming her, let her fall out of the spotlight, and then maybe she can REALLY get the help she needs instead of getting arrested for heroine like she did this week. Yikes.

Who else watches Teen Mom around here? What do you guys think about these awful, entertaining, completely delusional women?